10 reasons why a playoff beard helps teams

In the good old school days, I’d observe some friends give up catering to their facial hair in times of exams. The popular claim would be that they are too busy with their studies to spend time shaving beards. That would result in quite a few grizzly bears. Sports being a field where men are allowed and encouraged to be in touch with their youth, this tradition carried on with some changes in professional sports. The exam beard becomes the playoff beard. Teams vow to remain unshaven until they win or are knocked out of the playoffs or make the playoffs. A variety of pledges can be cemented with a playoff beard. For instance, it is well known that the reason behind the stellar late season play of the Dallas Mavericks has been their .500 pledge. They resolved to keep the razor away from their faces until as a team they can climb above .500. Now, you can call it a .500 pledge, but the technical term for all manners of pledges involving a promise to remain unshaven is called a playoff beard. And here are 10 reasons why it works -

1. The pledge

One of the reason people get tattoos is to have a permanent visual reminder of the idea the tattoo represents. Some opt for a temporary tattoo instead of a permanent one. An even more temporary solution, albeit one used by kids mostly, is to hold your breath until you turn purple and someone takes notice. Another more dignified solution is to make a beard pledge. “We shall not touch razor to cheek until we accomplish the task!” Facial growth is a naturally growing visual reminder of your pledge.

2. The itch

The pledge is accompanied with an itch to fulfill it. A literal itch. A stubble is nice and rough to scratch your fingers against. A full fledged facial foliage makes for a lot of scratching, especially when watered generously by sweat. One reason athletes strive to fulfill playoff beard pledges is simply because they want to get rid of it quickly. That’s an added motivation to play better.

3. The look

Men know the impact of facial hair. It can make the difference between a grizzled scowl and a childlike pout. The size of facial hair is directly proportional to gruffness in your appearance. It can make for an intimidating sight for your opponent. Especially when the entire team is attired similarly.

4. The camaraderie

There’s a reason why a team wears the same jersey, why teams have a logo and a mascot, why they travel together in the team’s official buses/planes – it gives the team an identity and let’s the players bond together over shared looks and experiences. Watching each other being every bit as ungroomed as you fosters a bond between brothers, thick as the thickets of the beards they grow. They say that suffering strengthens bonds and brings people together. Going through the unpleasant experience of growing matted locks makes the bonds between teammates that much stronger.

5. The test

Not everyone can grow a full fledged beard. A lot of us are stuck with something which looks like toothpick shavings poking out and on the other hand of the hirsute spectrum, we have grizzly bears whose foliage could house an entire forest worth of creatures. Birds attempt to make nests in those beards. And they pluck twigs from the scrawny beards of the rest of us whose facial hair resembles more of a cactus than a tree brimming with leaves. As the pledge advances, the men are separated from the boys in appearance. Those not blessed with dense foliage have another reason to play better and bring the pledge to a quick end.

6. The guarantee

When Kobe Bryant promised that the Lakers would make it to the playoffs, he was just responding to a question about whether he thought that the Lakers could make it to the postseason. But it soon snowballed into a guarantee. And the fans knew it and cheered the team accordingly. Having a playoff beard guarantee brings more support from the fans who can see that you are committed towards achieving your pledge.

7. One man army

In 1993, Sheffield United’s striker Alan Cork refrained from shaving for the four-month period of his club’s run to the FA Cup semi finals. Although he wasn’t joined by the entire team, his lone dog move made a statement which inspired the team and brought them together. He scored the lone goal for his team in the semifinals which they lost 2-1 to Sheffield Wednesday.

8. The convenience

Trimming facial hair takes time, two minutes at the most. In the time it takes to make Maggi noodles, a man can go from unshaved to shaved with ease. But those two minutes add up when you have to sacrifice them daily. A playoff beard saves you time. And you have more time to devote towards your training.

9. The inconvenience

Apart from having to pluck lint and comb away stray bugs, dense facial foliage makes it a pain to eat. Food passes through the lips after the moustache has taken its cut. Sweat accumulates and drips down like a faucet from the bottom of the beard. And you count down the days until you can fulfill the pledge.

10. The relief

When you finally achieve the pledge, you get to deforest the growth and reveal the Johnson & Johnson Googly Woogly Woosh cheeks and chin. Then run a smooth hand over it with a smile and a nod at the mirror. The anticipation of the relief due is quite a motivation.