Video: Cricket Australia comes out with real world first-player batting camera

In all my years writing this blog, I’ve tried to take the piss out of a lot of players and a lot of the decisions made by Cricket Australia. I’ve created dartboard decorations with various England players’ faces on them and suggested such things as everyone going out in sympathy with Nathan Lyon by wearing Ricky Ponting masks. It seems reasonable, then, that I might have come up with something like Twatto-view. Sadly, I missed that little gem of an idea but fear not, for the good folks at Cricket Australia have saved the day.

I’m not kidding. Check it out: Twatto-view

In a world full of cricket training ideas, books and paraphernalia surely nothing can compare with the genius that is Twatto-view. No, really; think about it. With Twatto-view, you too can see what it’s like to face about 30 balls before getting out. You can pretend it’s you calling for a run when a run isn’t there and, most importantly, you can keep an eye on the sidelines for when this weeks disgraced cricketer (probably Dave Warner again) is about to run on with your ribena in your Barbie flask. Twatto-view is set to become the number one training tool in schools and clubs across Australia, as there is an urgent need to teach young players what happens when they don’t watch the ball, what they should not do with their feet and, crucially, what it’s like to get out lbw again and again and again.

If only I’d thought of it first.

And, with that, I am off on holiday for a week. Try not to slag Clarke off too much while I’m gone; I think Ponting has done enough of that for all of us.