Satire: 5 completely ridiculous reasons why some people dislike Ajinkya Rahane

There are some who feel that Ajinkya Rahane must take responsibility for his ODI record. After all, the team management only took him out of the position he has batted in his entire career; thus forcing him to adapt to a new position and learn the kind of game that it requires at the international level.

Clearly, it's all his fault. Everything is his fault. The Greek economic crisis is his fault. Let's all blame Ajinkya Rahane. Lynch him. Flog him. Hang him by his thumbs.

Lock up your bats and cricket balls, or he may try to practice with them. Don't criticize his performance; he may take it on board and use it to become a better player. Don't send him overseas or he will score runs there.

The man is out of control! Something must be done about the Rahane menace.

#1 Indecisiveness

Ajinkya Rahane is too indecisive to make it as a top flight cricketer. The man can’t even make a decision on that crucial part of an international cricketer’s repertoire; facial hair. What’s with all that stubble?

Mitchell Johnson has his Mitch-stache. Moeen Ali has his beard. Shikhar Dhawan has his Gabbar inspired moustache that helps him strike fear in the hearts of the opposition. Virat Kohli rocks his bad boy look, complete with appropriate facial hair. Imagine these players without their facial hair. Go ahead. Not the same, is it?

Alternatively, Steven Smith has no facial hair. He’s the best batsman in the world. His clarity of thought process is reflected in both is batting and grooming. What is Rahane playing at with his stubble? Does he imagine himself to be some sort of cross between Smith and Kohli? Is that what he’s trying to prove with his look?

For his sake and ours he needs to make a decision. Shave it all or go all in and commit to a role. How can he be expected to handle attacks like the South Africans’ on grounds like the MCG in high pressure situations like the World Cup if he can’t even sort out his personal grooming?

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