Impact Wrestling Report: March 23rd 2017 - Karen Jarrett returns to make Impact great again
The show began with a graphic for Jim Ross’ wife, the late Jan Ross, followed by a video package of last week’s show's highlights.
#1 Davey Richards (w/ Angelina Love) vs. Suicide
Davey Richards and Angelina Love kissed each other before making their way to the ring.
After getting in the ring, Davey Richards glared at Suicide (portrayed by Caleb Konley) and then took him down with a shoulder block. Richards started working on the masked wrestler by kicking him into a corner. Suicide retaliated with a head scissors, sending Richards to the outside.
After getting in the ring, Richards got dropkicked into the corner. Richards attacked Suicide and sent him crashing into the guard rail. Richards then hit Suicide with a Mafia Kick and sent him back into the ring. Suicide retaliated with some body shots but was immediately taken down by Richards via a Clothesline.
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Richards kicked Suicide and then again started making out with Angelina Love. After that Richards again focused his attention towards Suicide and charged towards him, but Suicide, now recuperated, hit Richards with a Shoulderblock and a Springboard Dropkick.
Suicide hit a flying body press for a near fall. He attempted to back suplex Richards, but Richards moved away and instead got hit with a springboard moonsault. Richards nailed Suicide with a running forearm. Richards then jumped from the top to hit the double foot stomp, but Suicide rolled away and pinned Richards for a near fall.
Richards hit Suicide with the Creeping Death and pinned him to pick up the victory.
Post-match Segment #1
Impact Wrestling commentator Josh Mathews complained about Jeremy Borash looking on his phone at reports. Borash informed Mathews that he was not going to enjoy "her" return. Mathews inquired about "her's" identity, to which Borash replied that Mathews was going to find out soon.
A video of LAX was shown playing cards at the table. Konnan said that Impact Wrestling came to Tijuana and tried to steal their tag titles, so now, they will do the same to Impact.
Mckinzie Mitchell interviewed a drunk Laurel Van Ness. McKinzie asked Laurel how she was holding up, to which, Laurel replied that she was doing fine, but Laurel's mask immediately fell and she started ranting about how she was supposed to have babies, their names, and also offered to show their pictures to Mckinzie.
Mckinzie said that she would like to see the pictures before Laurel burst out saying there were no pictures and started blaming everyone. Sienna came to Laurel's aid and tried to calm her. Laurel told Sienna that she didn't blame Maria.
Sienna told Laurel to blame Allie and Braxton Sutter for everything because they were the ones that took everything away from her. Sienna informed Laurel to stay prepared for she has a surprise planned for Sutter and Allie.
#2 Idris Abraham, Fallah Bahh, & Mario Bokara vs. Mahabali Shera, Laredo Kid, & Garza Jr.
Idris and Garza Jr. started the match going back and forth for a while before Laredo Kid tagged and got dropkicked by Abraham. Bokara tagged in and tried suplexing Kid, but Kid avoided Bokara's attempts and hit Bokara with a Hurricanrana, thus sending him flying into the corner.
Bahh tagged in and shoved down Kid. Bahh backdropped Kid from the top to the Apron. Kid tried to move his way out, but Bahh hit him with a running cross body block.
Bokara tagged in and started working over Kid. Bokara hit Kid with several suplexes scoring several near falls. Bokara locked Kid so that Abraham could attack him. Abraham missed a charge in the corner and was met by a stunner from Kid.
Kid tagged in Shera. Shera clobbered Bokara with his right hands. Abraham tried to interfere but was thrown on to the outside. Bahh got hit with the Sky High. Kid and Garza hit stereo moonsaults on Bahh and Abraham. Shera hit Bokara with the Sky High to pick up the win.
Post-match Segment #2
A limo pulled up in the back. A limo driver blocked the camera guy in the back from looking in the limo.
#3 Decay (w/ Rosemary) vs. Reno Scum
Crazy Steve and Thornstowe began the match. Steve got clobbered with Thornstowe's big right hand.
Abyss and Luster tagged in with Luster pinning Abyss into a corner. Luster started hitting Abyss with a barrage of headbutts to the chest. Abyss Irish-whipped Luster into a corner, but Luster reversed it and headbutted Abyss once more.
Crazy Steve tagged in but was taken down in the corner. On the outside, Rosemary worked over Thornstowe.
Steve worked over Thornstowe by applying several crossfaces. Abyss tagged in and charged in the corner. Steve tagged in and worked over Thornstowe. Luster tagged in and took out Abyss with a shoulder block from the top rope. Abyss dropped to the outside and got whipped into the stairs.
Rosemary sprayed the mist but caught Steve by accident. She got tossed on the outside. Reno Scum took out Steve and pinned him to take the win.
#4 Eli Drake (w/ Tyrus) vs. Moose
As Eli made his way to the ring, the cameras started rolling after Cody Rhodes (wearing a Bullet Club sweatshirt) emerged from the limo with his wife, Brandi.
Brandi tried stopping Cody, but he would hear none of it and promised her that he wasn't going to do anything stupid. Cody entered the Impact Zone and nailed Moose with a Steel Chair and finished him off with a Cross-Rhodes on the stage.
Brandi took Cody away. Officials came in to check on Moose, who, although beaten up, still wanted to fight Cody. Josh Mathews said that Moose knew he had this coming.